1. Home

And Now He's on as Many Stamps as a President

By December 22, 2012

Follow me on:

At this time of year, let's remember to credit the USPS, once the USPOD, with proving the existence of Santa Claus, when they delivered the mail addressed to him to the fellow named Kris Kringle in Miracle on 34th Street (1947). It was during a trial where the fact of Kringle's identity - and his sanity - was being seriously questioned. From the radio play based on the film:

JUDGE:

What evidence?

KRIS:

This letter, your Honor.

JUDGE:

Oh, yes, Mr. Kringle?

KRIS:

(WITH QUIET PASSION) It's from Susan Walker. She believes in me! Oh, this letter means more to me than anything in the world.

FRED GAILEY, Defense Attny.:

That letter, your Honor, was delivered by the United States Post Office -- an official agency of the federal government. The Post Office Department is one of the largest business concerns in the world. Last year did a gross volume of over one billion dollars and this year...

MARA, Prosecuting Attny.:

Your Honor, I'm sure we're all gratified that the Post Office is getting along so well... But what bearing has it on the sanity of that man?!

FRED:

My point is that the Post Office department is a model of efficiency...

(THE JUDGE NEEDING MORE EVIDENCE FROM THE DEFENSE GETS IT -- IN THE FORM OF HUGE SACKS OF MAIL ADDRESSED TO KRIS KRINGLE.)

JUDGE:

Now, now, just a second here!

POSTMAN:

Ah, we'll do it, your Honor. Through rain, through sleet, through courtrooms -- anything! We deliver!

JUDGE:

Mr. Gailey!

FRED:

Your Honor, every one of those letters in every one of those mail sacks is addressed to Santa Claus. The Post Office delivered them. Therefore, the Post Office Department recognizes Kris Kringle to be the one and only Santa Claus.

PILING OF MAIL SACKS STOPS

JUDGE:

Since the United States Government declares this man to be Santa Claus, this court will not dispute it! Case dismissed!

***

And...scene!

Heartwarming certainly, especially the part about the post office doing so well. Just remember, if anybody takes you to court to question your identity, for your defense you can always use the sanity clause. Ho Ho Ho!

Comments

Comments are closed for this post.

Leave a Comment


Line and paragraph breaks are automatic. Some HTML allowed: <a href="" title="">, <b>, <i>, <strike>

©2014 About.com. All rights reserved.